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Monday, September 27, 2010

Restoration or Exploitation of Thyself

When I was just a little girl
I asked my mother, "What will I be? Will I be pretty, will I be rich??
Here's what she said to me.
Que Sera, Sera,
Whatever will be, will be
The future's not ours, to see
Que Sera, Sera .

The librarian plays Solitaire as the kids wait anxiously in the queue, the professor continues ,royally ignoring his inefficiency in teaching and it’s effectiveness in the form of successful distractions amongst students, family business becomes a compulsion and an excruciating U turn from fantasies which get wrapped n forgotten in d name of hobby( with oodles of stories to narrate after 30yrs…notice the pride in their eyes when they do that) for some fresh graduates, the maid servant screams she’ll charge extra for cleaning the pink handkerchief isolated in a heap of white bed sheets , a top brand manager of a popular newspaper feels he is caged in his office n pours his heart out to a 21yr old stranger, the beggar pushes her three tiny tots in a myriad of automobiles because they are a better bet when it comes to the Ka Ching. I wonder what would have happened had they questioned what was being dished out to them. What was fair? What justice and the right to choose means? I wonder if life would have been more miserable for them if these questions were answered. Which of the two makes sense…waiting for the answers or just keep on moving?

Angels from hell ( AFH…they take their job very seriously ) : why advertising after 4yrs of engg.? Why this drastic shift ?

Phaedrus ( 4 clouds of thoughts floating around the head)A) I am interested in the field.Gives me the adrenaline rush. ( Go drink coffee then.More effective….Don’t say this)
B) Working for college events ..which blossomed a liking for the field ( you are from xyz coll. Which is in a town called Nagpur with xyz events relatively small in number. Forget the 450 participants you got for your event. Other colleges from other cities talk in thousands….nope not this)
C) Creative I am. Can’t go with the flow.can’t follow the norms. ( Hmm but do you want to risk scaring them with your rebellious streak already? Think.
D) This is what I want to do. I know a quality education of 2yrs n I would have traveled enough to announce my arrival. Don’t you notice the passion in my eyes and words when I speak about what I like? The heart has reasons that reason cannot know ( hahahaaa. Wrong century,dudette!! Its not thirst to learn , its thirst to earn)

What comes out of the mouth is what lies in the heart…Ohhh Phaedrus, you romantic fool !! The queen of Hearts has always been your best bet. Says Phaedrus : “ if everyone continued with what they started then Rajnikanth would still be a bus conductor n Sean Connery , a milkman.” (option E will occur rarely.we will hesitate to chose it most of the times.only the brave n foolish go ahead with it.)

AFH collapse stupefied .

Satan seems to understand and laughs.

Phaedrus remains an incorrigible dreamer.Now it seems to me, some fine thingsHave been laid upon your tableBut you only want the ones that you cant get….Desperado.

An 18 yr old drags his feet claming it to be a moonwalk in a reality show viewed by millions. Says he has been doing it from d age of one. He has to be like MJ. That is all he knows n that is all he wants. Phaedrus laughs. Somebody save him. She believes she’ll cause rain when she sings the Malhar raag. She begins and frogs surrender to the snakes (its better to die this way than die due to lack of rainfall ..which won’t take place ever ).Phaedrus squeals and rolls on the sofa laughing like a maniac. What makes these fools believe they can sail through their entire life doing something they are not even meant to do? 6 months…Phaedrus, the joke is on you. Can you even manage a smile now? Self awareness needs lot of courage. Unfortunately, it needs a stamp of agreement from people sitting high up there. When you are there, people think that you really know.

Do we really have a control over what we want? Why do others play an important role in deciding our access to our desires? Is is okay to fear that you might go waste? Why is it so agonising when you dare to ask questions but never find the answers? Why is everyone running in the same rat race? Even if you win you still remain a rat. Is is okay to find a reason for each chase? They say I gotta learn But nobody's here to teach me. If they can't understand it, how can they reach me?Ayn Rand says…Nothing is given to man on earth except a potential and the material on which to actualize it.The potential is a superlative machine: his consciousness; but it is a machine without a spark plug, a m/c of which his own will has to be the spark plug,the self starter and the driver;he has to discover how to use it and he has to keep it in constant action.The material is the whole of the universe, with no limits set to the knowledge he can acquire and to the enjoyment of life he can achieve.But everything he needs or desires has to be learned,discovered and produced by him- by his own choice,by his own effort,by his own mind.I'm an educated fool with money on my mind Got my ten in my hand and a gleam in my eye.Too much television watching, got me chasing dreams…The spider continues spinning in the dark in spite of all the times the web is torn apart. Sometimes I wonder whether not questioning is the answer to most of the questions. Very difficult to do so for some one like Phaedrus but saves him from self mutilation.

1 comment:

  1. I look for an abode that houses my dreams, soil that germinates my craziness, a road that drives my imagination. Alas I get lost in the fact if I want it to be an apartment or a bunglow, a banyan or a mango, an expressway or a lane. Sometimes, I just want to be blindfolded and then see the world.

    I always wait for the curtains to be drawn and I wait like an excited kid for a great show only to realize that I am might not be sitting in the right show.

    And at every point do I've to explain as if without the outlet I'd strangle myself. The world loves to listen to explanations and we love to give them just to end up in a mockery of each other's insanity.

    But still the quest for the house, the tree and the road persists. Its better to walk albeit limping rather than sitting at the road's corner watching others speed away.

    Gr8 piece of art DC. The knack to link, correlate the small realities with the big picture comes across brilliantly again. My resort to find a refreshing read ended here. The toned down language was the perfect apostle as that led to better appreciation of the art without compromising on the beauty of the diverse pathways it took.

    "Sometimes i wonder whether not questioning is the answer to most of the questions."- Prodigious.

    Cheers :)